Nightmare

आजच्या महाराष्ट्रातील घडामोडींचा विचार करून, एका त्रस्त मुंबईकराच्या द्र्ष्टीकोनातून, तो काय विचार करत असावा ह्याचा आढावा म्हणजेच ही कविता होय. लाच खाणाऱ्या नेत्यांमुळेच मुंबईत वाढत चाललेले उत्तर भारतीयांचे लोंढे आणि त्या मुळे झालेली मुंबई शहराची दयनीय अवस्था उघड्या डोळ्याने बघत राहण्या खेरीज सामान्य मुंबईकरांकडे दुसरा काही इलाज नाही. मुंबई ही आता मराठी माणसाची राहिलेलीच नाही ह्याच्या पेक्षा मोठं दू:स्वप्न ते काय? ह्याच विषयावर सुचलेली एक कविता!

NIGHTMARE

आसुसलेल्या लोचनांनी,

 उतरलो मी 'V.T.' ला 

एकही मराठी चेहरा,

 नाही दिसला भेटीला - || १ ||

सहज वरती नजर फिरली, 

पहिले त्या पाटीला

'लालू यादव टेसन' बघुनी 

घाव झाला छातीला - || २ ||

संताप डोक्यात होता, 

पाहिले चहू बाजूला 

मराठी धरतीवरी ह्या, 

'भैय्या' होता माजला - || ३ ||

रम्य जीवन नष्ट झाले, 

काहीच मज ना कळे

मायेचे ते हाल बघता, 

रक्त माझे सळसळे - || ४ || 

होती 'देवनागरी' तरी, 

नव्हती ती संस्कृती

रद्दीतल्या 'महाराजांची' 

खिन्न होती आकृती - || ५ || 

सांडूनी रक्ताचे थेंब, 

भगवा ज्यांनी रोविला

षंढ नेत्यांनीच त्यासी 

'उपरेपणा' दाविला - || ६ ||  

ज्ञानेशाचे कर्म सारे, 

हो मिळाले मातीला

अब्ज-कोटीही  न पुरले 

ह्या पुढारी जातीला - || ७ || 

खिन्न झालो, सुन्न झालो, 

होत होत्या यातना

'मुंबई' अखेरीस झाली 

पश्चिमेची 'पाटणा' - || ८ ||

- अक्षय अशोक अणावकर 

बदल - My first attempt at writing an article in Marathi!

संध्याकाळचे 6 वाजले. श्रीधरला दरवाज्यावरची बेल वाजवल्यानंतर लक्षात आलं की घराची चावी त्याच्या खिशातच आहे... त्याने चावीने दरवाजा उघडला…स्वयपाकघराच्या आत मधून फक्त भांडी आपटण्याचा आवाज ऐकू आला... श्रीधरला आगामी संकटाची कल्पना आली... "आज काही खैर नाही... Madam चा मूड आज सुद्धा ऑफ दिसतोय" असं स्वतःशीच पुटपुटत, आणि, लाटणं कधी हि आणि कुठूनही डोक्यावर बसेल... ह्या भीतीनेच श्रीधर

स्वयपाकघरात शिरला... भांड्यांच आपटणा चालूच होतं... बाहेरून स्वच्छ पण तरीही अगणित पोचं पडलेली ती भांडी बघून श्रीधरच्या ह्रदयात गल्बललं. स्वयपाकघरात पाठमोरी उभी असलेली ती मात्र, भांडी आपटण्यापासून निर्माण झालेला नाद ऐकण्यात, अतिशय गुंग होती... श्रीधरला ती भांडी अचानक स्वतःच्या आयुष्याच्या खूप जवळ वाटली… एके काळी ती भांडी किती छान दिसत… लख्ख… एक समान आकार.. अहो, आधी आधी तर फक्त पाहुणे घरी यायच्या वेळीच ती भांडी कपाटातून बाहेर पडत… त्यात बनवलेला जेवण देखील फार स्वादिष्ट लागायचं म्हणे…पण आज… आजच्या घडीत मात्र “भांडं” आणि “भांडण” ह्यांचंच एक वेगळं नातं जुळलं होतं… 

श्रीधरला त्याचे जुने दिवस आठवले… इंदू आणि त्याची पहिली भेट ही इंदूच्याच घरी कांदे पोहे खाताना झाली. श्रीधर तिच्या करारी डोळ्यांच्या, बघता क्षणीच प्रेमात पडला होता. त्याची विचार चक्रे सुरु झाली. देवक, सप्तपदी, 

अंतरपाट, अक्षता, पंगती, उखाणे, सनईचे सूर - सगळं सगळं काही एका क्षणात त्याच्या मनात डोकावून गेले. तो दिवस किती छान होता… आणि त्या  नंतरचे काही दिवसही… एक अजाण व्यक्ती आपल्या आयुष्यातली सर्वात महत्वाची व्यक्ती होते, जीवन संगिनी होते… लग्नानंतरच्या त्या काही वर्षांमध्ये ही नाती उलगडत जाण्यात किती गंमत असते. प्रेम - प्रेम म्हणजेच सर्वोच्च, प्रेमा मध्ये केलेले त्याग, तिचं एक स्मितहास्य दिसण्यासाठी केलेली धडपड… Platform वर २ तास नुसतं वाट बघत थांबून राहणं.. तेही न चिडता. “तुझी वाट बघत बसण्यात सुद्धा मजा आहे!”… असा विचार करणं… ते सारे अनुभव अविस्मरणीय आहेत… पण सगळ्याच गोड गोष्टी तिन्ही काळ टिकत नाहीत असं म्हणतात… बदल घडतो तो इथे…

श्रीधर आणि इंदूच्या आयुष्यात बरेच बदल आले... काही चांगले, काही वाईट.. श्रीधरच्या मते त्यांच्या आयुष्यात आलेल्या जवळ जवळ सगळ्या बदलांना बेधडक पणे सामोरं जायची शक्ती त्याला इंदू कडूनच मिळाली होती तिचं अखंड मिळणारं पाठबळ त्याला त्यांच्या वाईट परिस्थितीतही उंच भराऱ्या मारण्याचं साहस करू द्यायचं. पण ३ वर्षांपूर्वी श्रीधर आणि इंदूच्या २० वर्षीय अपत्याचे प्रातःकालीन निधन झाल्यामुळे इंदू आता तीच इंदू राहिली नव्हती. इंदूने ह्या बदलापुढे मात्र हात टेकले. ह्या बदलाला सामोरे जाण्याची ताकत आता इंदू मध्ये शिल्लकच नव्हती. एरवी सदैव हसतमुख असलेली इंदू आता मात्र अगदी क्षुल्लक कारणांमुळे चीडचीड करू लागली होती. आयुष्यात आलेला एक अचानक बदल व्यक्तीमत्वात, नात्यात आणि जगण्यात कितीतरी कायमचे बदल करून जातो! ‘प्रेम’, 'आनंद', 'मजा', 'मस्करी' ह्या शब्दांनी घेतलेलं सर्वोच्च स्थान आता ‘वास्तविकता’ ह्या शब्दाने घेतलेलं असतं. प्रेमात पडलेल्या दोन्ही व्यक्तींसाठी संपूर्ण जग हे तीच दोघं असतात. थोड्या वर्षांनी त्यांना कळतं की बाहेरची दुनिया सुद्धा अस्तित्वात आहे. हाच त्यांच्या साठी एक अचानक बदल असतो. हा बदल स्वीकारण्याच्या नादात बऱ्याच गोष्टी गृहीतही धरल्या जातात. आतल्या गाठीच्या व्यक्तींची ‘आतली गाठ’ सहज दिसूही लागते. वास्तविकता स्वीकारणं ऐकायला जितकं सोपं वाटतं तितकच कठीण ते आचरणात आणणं असतं. एखादी व्यक्ती ही आधी अशी नव्हती, पण आता अशी का वागते आहे? हा बदल का घडला? ह्या प्रश्नाचं उत्तर मिळणं जवळ जवळ असंभव असतं. पण थोरांनी असं म्हटलंच आहे ‘काळ - हे ह्रदयातील जखमांसाठी रामबाण औषध आहे!’ श्रीधरला हे कळून चुकलं होतं की 'बदल' हा आयुष्यातला एकमेव कायमस्वरूपी घटक आहे. म्हणूनच ह्या वास्तविक्तेशी जमवून घेणं हाच एक सर्वमान्य तोडगा आहे. 

श्रीधरला हे ही अगदी प्रकर्षाने जाणवलं होतं की इंदूची जागा आता त्याला घ्यायची होती... कढई दाणकन ओट्यावर आपटली आणि श्रीधर भानावर आला. त्याच्या चेहऱ्यावर हसू होतं आणि पाऊलांमध्ये एक उधाण. इंदूचा प्रोब्लेम जाणून घेण्यासाठी आणि तिच्या चेहऱ्यावरील हसू परत आणण्यासाठी, स्वतः मध्ये हा 'बदल' कसा आणावा हा विचार करीत तो पुढे सरसावला... 

Henpecked Life....

This post is actually a विडंबन काव्य.. Which means a SPOOF. Its a take on the sufferings of a Hen-Pecked husband... This has to be sung in the tune of a very famous Old Marathi Song 'देहाची तिजोरी', which was composed by great Shri. Sudhir Phadke or 'Babuji' as he is known fondly... The spoof was coined by Yashwant Dev who himself is a renowned composer in Marathi Music... 


पत्नीची मुजोरी, तिची नित्य सेवा

मरण धाड देवा आता, मरण धाड देवा   11 धृ 11

सकाळी चहाच्या वेळी, दुखे हिची पाठ

बिछान्यात पडल्या पडल्या जांभई विराट

हिची एक इच्छा हाती झाडू मी धरावा 

मरण धाड देवा आता, मरण धाड देवा  - १

सदा मैत्रिणीचा घोळ, गप्पा आणि खाणे

पर्स घेउनी मौजेने मार्केटिंगला जाणे

स्वामी असुनी मी घराचा दास का ठरावा?

मरण धाड देवा आता, मरण धाड देवा  - २

काल हिने केली पूजा, अंगणी वडाची...
सात जन्म निश्चित झाली, कैद ह्या जीवाची.
माझ्या दुर्भाग्याचा अजूनही हवा का पुरावा?
मरण धाड देवा आता, मरण धाड देवा - ३

And The Result Is.....

27th June 1999 - At the age of 16, it was a lot of pressure to handle. The reason - X std Board exam results were out. Just earlier that day I was standing in a mile long queue outside S.I.E.S. college, Sion. to get an admission form.. I still don't know why did I even consider getting a form from S.I.E.S.? I dint have ONE good reason to be a part of that esteemed Alma Mater.. I am not a South Indian (which is a so called privilege given to that minority), I wasn't expecting more than 85% marks in SSC (which was the minimum qualification to get into FYJC Science) and I stayed at Dombivli (which translated to approximately an Hr long train commute during rush hrs). But somehow my 2 hour long wait in the June drizzle got me a wet, crumpled S.I.E.S. admission form!


I headed straight to Dombivli by catching the next available train from Sion stn. This was the most miserable commute in years despite a relatively empty train... For the whole 45 min - 1 Hr journey, all I was thinking was about that goddamn BLUE sheet of paper which will have my career path planned for me... My mind raced through time - End of IX std finals, X std coaching admission, VOWs to study very hard for the whole coming year (which was never kept), first day of school on June 13th, Decent results in 1st Unit Tests, Crying like crazy over lost love (or a mere crush!), Annual Sports meet at school, Annual Social Gathering, Filling slam books for friends, Prelims, Disastrous results (67% - To be specific), Send Off party at school, Getting upset, Studying hard again, giving all exams, enjoying vacations and hmmmpppffff... 'Twas today - the D-Day!

Wandering back in time, made me realize the prowess of the old proverb/idiom that I had learnt in IV std - "As You Sow, So Shall You Reap", which simply meant You Do Not Deserve More Than 70% in SSC board exams... The train halted with a jolt... I came back to reality. Got down at the station and rushed to school to see the anxious faces of my friends.... Hoards of 16 year olds, unable to withstand the pressure were trying to behave normal. We were let inside, every passing moment gripped me with a weird feeling. Inside, we were called out by our roll # on the hall ticket. "E-188669!", the teacher yelled. I went to the podium with my heart beating faster and louder with every single step... The teacher held out the mark-sheet... She dint even look at me.. Even I dint care. All I wanted to do was snatch that damn thing off her hand and look at the result of my 'PERFORMANCE' of the entire year...

I prayed - one last time - and looked at the mark-sheet, it was a whopping 78.13% Honestly I was NOT really expecting these marks... My papers had really gone PATHETIC to get those marks.. 75% being an above average score, I had scored ABOVE the above average limit... I was very happy... Turns out that I scored well because of languages.. Later I got to know that I had stood FIRST in English subject in the entire school and it definitely was a big thing for me! I rushed home with some sweets to let Mum, Dad and Tais know that I was ELIGIBLE to be a part of the Science stream of a decent college...


Parents were probably expecting more out of me so they gave their career best performance in acting proud! Both the Tais were excited that I dint let the family TOO down... Ashwini Tai promised to spend the whole next day with me discussing my career options and I slept like a LOG thinking about the new venture of my life called - COLLEGE...

A. Naik -- Caught & Bowled H. Parikh -- 26 (26)

  4th July is celebrated as Independence Day here in Red-Blue-White Country where US citizens celebrate their FREEDOM... But my dear friend chose this day to celebrate his Life Sentence... Yes - My pal of a decade Mr. Aditya Naik or as we fondly call him Sade Bara (12:30), is more than happy to surrender himself in the embrace of the deadliest phenomenon happening in a Guy's life... No points to guess... He's getting engaged...

I remember the year 2007 (which was my first trip to India) when a fine evening, Naik, Avi (Another Fellow Antonian) and I were taking long walks near Naik's place in Vakola... We were discussing the usual fun stuff when Naik suddenly went,

Naik: Guys I want to let you know something.

Avi: What happened man? U into Drugs or something...


(Knowing that Naik wud not even touch a PAPER ciggie, let alone a real one, I figured that this had to be something of a personal mishap!)

Akki: Dude r u in LOVE or what???

Naik: I dunno how to say this... But kinda I am....

Avi: Duh.. and whose the 'GUY' ?

Akki: Avya...I think he's serious... Naik Bol re..

Naik: Well, She's my roomie at Dallas.... and we stay together...

Akki: What? wow dude.. so u already in a LIVE-IN relationship huh... Score man!

Naik: No man... she duz not even know about this... and just so u know - we 4 share a room, Bhide n I in one and Navya and Hinal share another!

Avi: So who happens to be YOUR Love interest???

Naik: Its Hinal... Hinal Parikh... and we are really very very good friends... Its been the first time in my life that I am so comfortable being MYSELF in front of her...

( This was so true... Naik being a LOYAL ANTONIAN for almost 1/4th of his HALE 'N HEARTY life, anything remotely female was like a burning charcoal in hand for Naik... You take it in hand only when you are forced to and You can't hold it for more than 3 sec... I was very happy that finally Naik had come out of his Antonian Genre and started to live life like a NORMAL guy! )

Avi: OK... So when r ya gonna tell her?

Naik: I never will...

Akki: What? Why? What's the problem man?

Naik: Methinks their family won't allow us and probably its not even the right time... I  haven't even graduated, I dunno wen would I get a job... Probably she might even get married before I m capable to stand on my own feet!

Whoooooooooooooooooshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... Time flew...
So it was that day and it is TODAY that I have received Naik n Hinal's personal invitation card to attend the C-day of their life! (Wedding being the D-day... This is one step less.. Lol). Both Naik n Hinal had to go thru a lot of ordeal to make things happen the way they wanted, Thats why I really SALUTE their LOVE for each other and its prowess to stay with each other in times of both joy n sorrow...



I wish both of them all the good things in LIFE and May God bless them... Yeh Baat aur hai ki, when we all Antonians meet up on July 4th, Naik is gonna be our SCAPEGOAT as usual... That's a tradition... I m so excited to see that day!!!

LONG LIVE ANTONIANS!!!
 

Ekal Concert @ Houston!

I had performed at the Ekal Vidyalaya Chapter of Houston in Feb 2010... It was after a long time (My last performance was in Atlanta, GA in Feb 2008..... So it was nearly 2 years that I had not performed in front of a live audience!!!!) that I got this amazing three-fold opportunity:

  1 - To perform in front of a huge croed (Almost a 1000!!)  

  2 - The gig was in Houston so I could get to meet my Good Ol' Pals of my Good Ol' Masters Era...
   3- 'Twas a sponsored trip from LA to Houston so no pennies were shelled off my own pocket (ugghh... I know...pretty cheap thought... huh... But staying in LA is tuff folks!)

My concert was amazing... 'Dost Loga' from Houston, grabbed the front seat in the auditorium to cheer for me... They definitely did a great job... I started my introductory song with the Hit Qawwali of the 1970s, the Laxman-Pyarelal masterpiece - 'Pardah Hai Pardah' from Amar Akbar Anthony... Its been my signature song., or so i believe.. I love performing this song in front of a live audience, I make'em clap, sing and dance with me... and the whole credit goes to the composition itself... Dexter Raghunanan on Tabla, Kamal Haji on Keyboard and Ramesh on Guitar was a lethal combination which helped me make my introduction a huge success.


.
Thus, I sang quite a few songs one after another. Especially 'Kuhu Kuhu Bole Koyaliya' being just out of the blue owing to Uma Mantravadi - The self-proclaimed 'SENIOR-MOST' singer in the group... I too did believe her until she opened her mouth to sing... Well, she; most definitely was the SENIOR-MOST singer by AGE and that's it! Then I went on to sing 'Laaga Chunari Pe Daag' which was also a huge hit of its time.. immortal even today! Unbelievably, but true, the concert went on for 4 hrs straight with 0 people bored! That IS an achievement guys!!



Some days later, my friend happened to search my name on Google, (Ya.. that is our fav TP as we are thrilled to see our name come up under Google!!) this link on VOICE OF ASIA newspaper showed up covering the Ekal Concert!!! I'd love to share the article with u guys... I SO loved it... I hope so u will too!

Feeling Nostalgic...

I just remembered the time when I was in school and there were way too many things that Mum n Dad and my sisters wanted to me to do... Surprisingly I was a known face in school as a 'GOOD BOY' for teachers, a 'GOOD FRIEND' for my guy friends, 'A STUPID MONITOR' for girls and last but not the least... 'THE BOY WHO COULD SING!!!' Come some 'free lecture' and Teachers used to say, "C'mon Akshay, come to the podium and sing a song for all of us..." As soon as this 'recurring' dialog ended, this was the time to have a look at a variety of expressions on the faces of my classmates...


My friends.. or true friends... very enthusiastically cheered for me for a time - since I got up from my 'FIRST BENCH' till the time I reached the teacher's podium... Some girls who used to have a fancy for me (Blusshhhinnggggg... huh?... Ya there were a few.. I ain't kiddin'...) used to share a smirk with me from their benches.... The 1 girl that I used to like, used to take her 'ALGEBRA' textbook out and start solving the 'D-Group Problems...', (hhmmmppffff)... Guys which deliberately turned a deaf ear to my 'Oh! So Soothing Music', would start playing their unfinished Book Cricket Game! Amidst all this, defying all laws of ethics, here I was standing tall on the podium besides the teacher singing my signature song which was a 1950 HIT from 'Chalti Ka Naam Gaadi' --> 'Ek Ladki Bheegi Bhaagi Si' Believe it or not, I sang this song for 10 years in school... every single time my teachers called me to sing on stage...


But then there were a few times when I had made my school proud when I bagged a 2nd position at 'All India Original Light Music' competition organised by State Bank of India in the year 1997-98... This song penned down by Baba and composed by Baba and Pt. Arun Kashalkar together... This is one of Baba's best work according to me...


Thought of sharing this wonderful lyrics with all...


त्या जाहल्या चुकांची, मागितली क्षमा मी
उमजे मनास आता माफीस पात्र ना मी || धृ ||

शिक्षा असेल एक अक्षम्य त्या गुन्ह्याची
अज्ञातवास मजला संपर्क ना तुझ्याशी
भाळावरी मिरवीते हे दुःख वंचनेचे
मज यातना मिळाव्या, हे सूत्र संचिताचे || १ ||

देवा दयाघनाला करिते विनंती एक
हे दुःख साहण्याची पदरात घाल भीक
इतुके असून तरीही नाही मनात किंतु
तुज सौख्य मात्र लाभो, मनी हाच एक हेतू || २ ||